On Prayer
My little girl has been getting more and more interested in prayer; lately she’s been asking Steph and I to say our prayers so she can listen. We were talking the other day, and Steph said she told Caitlin she could tell God anything she wanted to. ANYTHING.
It makes me wonder, as adults, while many of us say we believe this, how many of us actually follow through? How many of us tell God ANYTHING we want to? Do we speak our mind to God? Open up? Do we say only what we think He wants to hear? Do we ignore aspects of our lives or our struggles, hoping He doesn’t see. Bad news if we do that – Him being omniscient and all.
That being said, maybe it’s time I really start being true. So here’s my “Anything” prayer to God:
Dear God,
I know I don’t talk to You near as much as I should. Yet, I’m not here to make excuses – what good would it do anyway? You know better.
Yet, here I am now.
I find myself wondering why I don’t talk to You more. Is it anger? I do get angry at you. I don’t understand You; why is it I sense You less when I need you most? And for that matter, must everything have to be a surprise? Can’t I even have a little peek at Your plans for my life? After thirty-five years, one would think I should have a clue… Yet…. It’s just not there.
…But I never doubt You’re there, God. It’s something I never question; it’s just something I know to be true.
I just wish…. Never mind. You get it, It’s hard to explain, but I know You know.
So I ask instead for personal clarity. I ask that You help me remember the good and not dwell on the bad. Help me be the dad and husband I need to be. I know I’ve had some royal screw ups, and ask for forgiveness from you as I seek forgiveness from others. Help me to forgive where I need to – there’s a lot of pent up anger inside me….
…winning the lottery – that would be nice too if You could work it in.
Amen.
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